Rules and regulations – we live by it, we abide it so that society can function properly. Similar to how a society works, rules must be enforced at home, among our family members, to ensure a healthy and positive family dynamic.
While establishing rules among adults are simple and straight-forward, the same situation cannot be applied to children. Adults learn by experience, what to do and what not to do. Children, in the meantime, have yet to live long enough to understand what proper response, behaviour, attitude, or even, manners look like.
It is your job, as their parents, to educate and nurture good character values within your children so that they grow up to be well-mannered, sensible individuals.
Disciplining children can be tough. Children simply are born with a rebellious streak and most of the time, that simply goes away into adulthood. Ask teachers, they know this by hand. No worries, here is a simple guide for parents to know the ‘What Not To Do’s’ of trying to discipline your child at home:
1- Establish the rules
Obviously the first step in instilling discipline is to establish a set of rules within your home. Just like schools and classrooms have rules, homes should have rules too.
The important thing to know here is that children will be children. Don’t establish rules that downright strip them of their childhood. Allowing room for them to have fun while maintaining good behaviour. Encourage positive rules such as taking turns, sharing, honesty, and taking responsibility.
This is particularly good when among siblings as children with siblings will learn how to cooperate among each other during play time and be responsible in case any accidents happen among themselves.
2- Make clear of the consequences
Now that you have successfully established a set of rules at home, be clear about what would happen if your child breaks them. Do not, however, instill fear in them with violent consequences.
The role of punishment is to shape and reinforce good behaviour. Examples of consequences that teach your children about the importance of following rules include revoking certain privileges such as screen time or playtime and time-outs.
Apart from punishments, to reinforce good behaviour is to reward good behaviour. Create a reward system in which with every good behaviour, your child gets a simple tangible or intrinsic reward. This develops a long-term mindset that there is a positive outcome from obeying the rules.
3- Taking the Time
Children take time to learn something new. If rules have never been laid out at home before, then it will probably take a little bit of time for your child to get used to it. This is why you can establish a form of structure within the household that includes a daily routine. For example, making the bed when they are supposed to, eating breakfast at a certain time, and doing their homework at specific times.
As time goes by, this routine will be ingrained within your child’s daily lifestyle and improve the functioning of your home. Make a timetable, similar to what they see at school, and place it on the wall. Go through each activity one by one with your child to make sure he/she understands the sequence of each daily activity. Be patient and always remind them in case they forgot or skip a routine. Do not rush your children to adapt to their new daily routine.
4- Be rational and fair
Put yourself in your child’s shoes. Always be understanding of whatever mistakes that your child has made. Any kind of aggressive or negative behaviour has to be handled in an calm and rational manner in order to avoid any kind of misunderstanding or permanent damage to your child’s socio-emotional development.
For instance, if your child is arguing among their siblings, be fair and investigate the cause of their argument. Let each of them explain their side and point of view of what is happening. Most importantly, I repeat, do not instill fear within them. Take the time to listen to each of their explanations and use your better judgment to resolve the argument.
As adults, we are far more capable of making the right evaluations and decisions for our children. Therefore, we must be able to set a good example for our children in order to educate them on the importance of good discipline.
Using this as a guide, disciplining children shouldn’t feel like you’re diving into a hornet’s nest. It is part of a parent’s responsibility to ensure their child is equipped with good moral values and attitude before going into the real world.
Within a 21st century classroom, discipline is an important element to ensure efficiency in the teaching and learning process when the students partake in collaborative and cooperative activities which makes a huge part of 21st century education.
By initiating the effort to develop discipline within your child at home, teachers will be able to manage your child better at school; thus, contributing positively to your child’s learning progress.
